MomoKai Drabbles
by Gothikalea
Summary: The name says it all, a few short disjointed drabbles; written as of June 27, 2010


Okay. Etto, I'm running out of ideas.  
How about a short drabble where we make Momo the idiot? Because I made Kaidoh the idiot last time. C:  
OMG HOW ABOUT THESE ARE JUST DRABBLES, yeah. As many drabbles as I can write OUT OF CHARACTER FAIL BY THE WAY MomoKaiMomoKaifail

[ Concerning . . . K a i d o h a s S e m e ]

"No, you can't be on top," whined Momo. He pushed Kaidoh off the bed, and earned an irritated hiss.  
"Why?" Kaidoh didn't mind being on bottom, but he wanted to know why.  
"Becauuse."  
"Because?"  
"Because, Mamushi, if you're on top, I'll get pregnant."  
Pfff. Kaidoh wanted to start laughing right now, but he turned it into an amused hiss. He didn't want to give Momo the satisfaction. "What the hell, you dumbass?"  
"You heard me." Momo grinned.  
"Is that the real reason, you idiot?"  
"Yes, of course that's the real reason!" Momo feigned fake indignance.  
"You are such an idiot." Kaidoh climbed back on top of his rival, holding Momo's wrists down.  
"Lemme go!" Momo tried to get up, laughing, but Kaidoh was pinning him down sufficiently.  
"Boys can't get pregnant, you idiot."  
"That's right, which is why I'm the boy in this relationship."  
"What'd you say, bastard!"  
"You heard me, Mamushi!" Momo laughed and pulled Kaidoh down, rolling over. He gave Kaidoh's neck a nice slow, long, lick.  
"Fshuuu..!"  
"If you wanna be on top, then you'll have to just take me."  
"...Stupid bastard, with your stupid excuses." Kaidoh was thinking of being nice and going slow, but now he wasn't in the mood anymore. If he was going to do Momo, it was going to be hard. Fast. Rough. It was going to hurt.  
Only until afterwards did he even suspect that that was what Momo had been aiming for in the first place.

[ Concerning . . . P r e g n a n c y ! ? ]

Momo showed up the next day with a big belly bulge equivalent to a lady who was about to give birth.  
One sentence could describe what Kaidoh thought right now. "What the hell?"  
"See, Mamushi, I told you I'd get pregnant." Momo started to stifle his laughter. It didn't work.  
Kaidoh poked Momo's tummy. It felt hard, like styrofoam.  
Momo slapped his hand away. "Don't poke our baby, he/she'll feel neglected!" Pff. Wahahaha.  
"Fshuuu, dumbass, stop doing stupid idiotic things like this."  
Momo gave a fake pout and rubbed his tummy. "So mean to our baby!"  
"Boys can't get pregnant," Kaidoh reiterated.  
"I was the girl last night, remember?"  
Kaidoh wanted to slap the grin off of that face. It was so irritating, but so cute at the same time. Momo probably spent ages fixing the styrofoam to do this, and it was just to make Kaidoh laugh. It was sweet.  
But such a stupid idea, nonetheless.  
"You idiot, I've never gotten pregnant."  
Oh. Ouch. Momo wondered how to counter that.  
"Well, if we did it more, then you probably would, Mamushi." Hint hint.  
"Idiot. Let's get this stupid thing off."  
"Ehh? But this is our baby, Mamushi. Your baby and mine." Again with that dumb grin. "Enough with this."  
But Kaidoh led Momo inside, anyway. If this was a plot to let Momo be on top, he needn'tve done it.  
He preferred it better when he was uke, anyway.

[ Concerning . . . F o r e v e r : F l u f f ]

Kaidoh and Momo lay beside the river where they always practiced together, exhausted, panting rapidly. The sun was now setting, and as the red-orange crimson spread throughout the sky, Momo couldn't help but feel a little bit moved.  
"Hey, Mamushi."  
"Fshuuu. Don't call me that."  
"Hey, Moron."  
"Fshuuuuu!"  
Momo grinned, taking Kaidoh's hand. "I wanna stay like this."  
"..." Kaidoh wished that they could, too. He felt so satisfied right now, it was hard to think clearly.  
"Mamushi, how long are we going to stay together?" Momo bit his lip. It sounded so...gay. Girly. But he really wanted to know, would Kaidoh stay with him? Or was this just...a fling?  
Kaidoh turned away, letting go of Momo's hand. "Idiot."  
"Eh?" Momo panicked. What did that mean? That Kaidoh didn't want to..?  
"You idiot, idiot."  
"Is our relationship going to last...even a year?" It was sad to think that Kaidoh would leave him.  
"We're going to the same high school, idiot," muttered Kaidoh.  
"Then, five years?" Five years was okay. Five years was definitely okay.  
But what happened after that?  
"We'll probably go to the same college," continued Kaidoh, in that low nearly-incomprehensible whisper.  
Well, then it could be a little longer.  
Now he could barely hear Kaidoh. "And although we can't get married officially in Japan...We can live together, right...?"

"..." Kaidoh still was turned away, but Momo knew it wasn't because he was rejected.  
"You're blushing!"  
Momo grinned and turned Kaidoh over, earning a hiss and a punch. But Momo hugged him, anyway.  
"So we'll stay together forever, then?"  
Kaidoh murmured the word quietly to himself.  
"Forever."

[ Concerning . . . C h i l d r e n ]

Momo ruined the moment, as usual, though, by laughing. Kaidoh prepared himself for the stupid comment that was sure to come up next.  
"So, Kaidoh, you'll be the house-wife for our kids, right?"  
"Fshuuuuu! I told you already, boys don't get pregnant! And no, you dumbass, I intend to make a living."  
"Ehh? So if we have love-children, then you won't take care of them?"  
Of course he would. Of course Kaidoh would. But he wasn't going to say that. "Love-children don't exist, you moron. They're only in messed-up yaoi stories that fangirls create."  
Momo was silent for a while.  
"What if we adopt?"  
"...Fshuu."  
"Hey, Mamushi, if we adopt, would you want a boy or girl?"  
"Boy, so I can teach him tennis."  
"Girls can play tennis, too, you know."  
"Hmph." They could, but girls were whiney a lot. Sort of like Momo.  
"I'd want a girl, so that I can dress her up like Mamushi."  
"What the hell!"  
Momo snickered. "That way I can see Kaidoh in a maid dress."  
"Fshuuu!"  
Kaidoh turned away again. That idiot.  
...Next Halloween, he'd shop for a maid outfit...

[ Concerning . . . W a t c h i n g ]

Playing doubles with Kaidoh was fun. Basically because of the possibilities Momo and Kaidoh could create; they were familiar with each other's movements as rivals, and pretty much knew what the other was thinking. This proved to be disadvantageous to the lesser-harmonized doubles players. Also, Momo could mimic Kaidoh's movemnts, and Kaidoh could mimic Momo's, so it was hard to tell whether Kaidoh was going to Dunk Smash or Boomerang Snake, etc.  
However, that wasn't the only thing. Something Momo enjoyed even more than winning was to be standing at the baseline.  
So he could stare at Kaidoh. His muscles moving, his deep concentration. Him sweating. His snake. His boomerang snake. Him hitting the ball. Him missing the ball.  
Yes, playing doubles with Kaidoh was definitely fun.

"Pervert."  
"Eh? What'd you call me, Mamushi?"  
"I called you a pervert. You keep staring at me."  
"Who would stare at you, dumbass?"  
"You're the dumbass." Kaidoh hissed and walked away.  
It was a pity that Kaidoh had noticed. Now Momo couldn't do it too much anymore, or else it would seem too obvious.  
Momo wondered if, when they played doubles, Kaidoh ever stared at ihim/i.

Kaidoh did. Stare at him, that was. Momo dunk-smashing, to him, was just so hot. I mean, he jumped up, so if you looked closely then you could see under his shorts, and his shirt always went up. And Momo trained a lot, despite what anyone thought. Probably not as much as Kaidoh, but he had to train some, because he wouldn't have such well-defined muscles otherwise.  
Yeah, so staring at Momo was hot. But when you stare at one long enough, you notice more about them. Like the fact that Momo stared back. To Kaidoh, this was just a huge turn-on. But he had no idea how to tell Momo what he wanted, so he just went up to Momo and called him a pervert.  
That didn't really get him anywhere, except for maybe making Momo stare at him less. But if Momo was staring at him less, then wouldn't Momo be thinking more about not staring at him?  
Which would make Momo stare at him more.  
Which was a pretty good deal to Kaidoh, anyway.

"Eh, Mamushi."  
Kaidoh did not answer the provocation. For heaven's sake, he was taking a piss.  
"Mamushi, Mamushi, I have something to say, so reply, ne?"  
"I'm taking a piss, you dumbass."  
Momo snickered. "Do you really need to go into the stall to do that-"  
"Shut up and say what you wanted to say, then leave." What, did Momo want to watch?  
Actually, Momo did want to watch, but he didn't say that. "Tch. Well. I just wanted to tell you - I'm not the only pervert here."  
And then he left, leaving Kaidoh. Much to his satisfaction, Kaidoh didn't come out of the restroom for quitee a long time. Momo could only imagine what he was doing.

One day, after they played doubles together, Kaidoh just couldn't take it anymore.  
"Dumb-...Momo."  
"Dumb Momo? You're running out of insults, Mamushi-"  
"Shut up. Get over here, now."  
"Eh? What's this, a date? And where is 'here' anyway?"  
"No, you idiot. My parents are out."

"..."  
"So you admit to being a pervert?"  
Kaidoh bit his lip. "It's your fault, dumbass."  
"Yeah, yeah, whatever. I know I'm hot." Over the summer, Momo had been working out. Can't lose to Mamushi, now can he? Luckily it had some benefits. If Kaidoh wasn't -that- turned on, then he probably wouldn'tve even asked Momo to come over.  
And since Kaidoh was the one that asked, that meant that Momo was on top.  
"...Fshuu. Bastard." Kaidoh hung up.  
But Momo thinks that Kaidoh's hotter still, of course.  
_

Uh, yeahh. Imma go today to town and see if this is 1k words, if it is, I'll post it, if not, I'll add till it's 1k. ;D I hoope you liekd teh fail. ;U;  
Edit: Sorry guys, couldn;t go to town today, guess I'll have to post three stories tomorrow instead. XDD Edit again: WHATEVER I'M POSTING THIS.  
I still need ideas, my ideas are beginning to recur XD...Uh, cheeea.  
Do you guys want more smut? XDD

IS ANYONE EVEN READING THIS

Oh well.

?  



End file.
